Like sands through the hour glass...

My Dad is always telling me to enjoy this season of life, it's fleeting, and when it's gone, all I'll have are memories. This season-the one I've begun to affectionately refer to in my head as "The Tribulation", I fear,due to my sleep deprived, over caffeinated fog, I may not remember at all. So this morning, I decided on a small but meaningful project. I set out to spend no more than 5 minutes capturing our life exactly the way it is right now, messy as it may be, it is our "now". In reality I spent more like 10 minutes taking pictures and about that putting them into black and white, but 20 minutes is a small amount of time to invest in freezing the sands of our hour glass. -'til next time...

I can only do what I can do...

Lately I'm finding I have a lot of things want to do. (and let's face it, the invention of Pinterest isn't helping) These days my activities are almost exclusively limited to baby care, and more often than not walking my ever fussy three month old daughter in circles around the house. (She's not actually fussy if I'm walking) But as I wear a path through the house, I see all of my unfinished projects laying about, almost taunting me with their undone-ness. (note my word invention there) My sewing machine is sitting out, taking up needed space, because I am certain that putting it away is admitting defeat. I move my knitting basket around the house, maybe managing to sneak in a row or two of that precious baby blanket I started, before that precious baby wakes from her ten minute nap. Today, and most days I can't DO much. But what can I do? I can blog from my phone while I pace the floor (as I am now). I can ignore the growing knot between my shoulders and just enjoy the smell of this sweet head of hair under my chin. I can allow my older children to sit and paint for what's going on 3 hours now, and know that while it might not be the academic heavy activities I had planned in my head, it IS art, and they ARE learning, and we are together. I can help my 7 year old read "The Giving Tree" even as I walk, filling in the words he can't sound out yet, and hear just how far he has come since we started this whole thing in July. My mental list continues to grow, but I am holding fast to the idea that I am here, present, loving them, doing my best to school them, watching the dishes and laundry go undone, the crafts unfinished and the chapters of my book unread..
But I can only do what I can do... Keep walking.

That Thing Called "Togetherness"

It's day 2 of homeschooling, so I thought I'd reflect a little. My immediate thought is: besides giving birth to them, this is the best thing I have ever done for my kids. That's not to say that it's a perfect solution, and it's only day 2...so we could still be in the "honeymoon" period. Although, we have spent all summer together and we aren't sick of each other yet, so I'd be surprised if we did at this point. (check back with me in a week and a half when we squeeze 3 adults (my 18 year old brother, my husband, and myself) and 5 kiddos into a one room cabin with no plumbing or air conditioning for 2 weeks and see if I feel the same way :) Why is this the best thing I've ever done for them? Because it's changing ME. I can see that already. I thought I was a pretty engaged parent before this, talking with the kids, paying attention to their needs, and pretty much being more attentive and involved than most, but now it is my mission, I'm spending deliberate, intentional one on one time with each of them during the day. They are each getting MORE from me than they were before this. Besides that, the prep time for each of their lessons forces me to think about each of them individually every evening after they're in bed. The time that I spend thinking about their strengths and weaknesses, likes, dislikes, and basically reflecting on WHO they are as people, and not them as a group is giving me an appreciation for them that I thought I had before. My second thought is that the amount of "togetherness" has seriously increased. I think it's really something that so many families today lack. This kid goes here doing this thing, Dad is off doing his thing, Mom has HER time....and that family bonding is seriously lacking. Maybe I'm old fashioned or have a totally different perspective than most, but I'd rather we stay home and do a lot of nothing TOGETHER than do a whole bunch of "stuff" apart. We are reading books together, sitting at the table nightly to talk about our day as a family, learning how to value each other even more than we have in the past, and learning together. In short, homeschooling was the last thing I wanted to do, but instead of listening to my selfishness, I chose to follow God's leading. And the blessings are already evident.

Back on the Wagon?

It's been just about a year since the last post. So, after a very long break, I finally feel "caught up" enough to post. As I'm hiding in the cool house from the heat of the day, I'm watching the inventions of boredom come to life. Tent's made of blankets and pillows are forming, a magazine sits shredded on the floor, and I'm trying to think up crafty indoor projects for the day, since we all agree it it just too hot outside. Since our summer project is to memorize the Beatitudes, we've picked one to do a project with today. A news paper, a Highlights magazine, some crayons and glue and we're finding the words to the verse and pasting them on our "poster" for the week. We're making a big old mess, but we're doing it together, and learning as we go. If I get really brave we might just break out that recipe for the homemade finger paint....